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Why You Should Tell Your Ex You’ve Moved on

September 29th, 2009

If you are in the process of trying to win back your ex boyfriend, the last thing that you want to do is lie to him. However, there are certain lies which can really help your situation. One such example is telling your ex that you’ve moved on. It may seem like a bad idea to tell your ex that you have moved on if you really haven’t, but it can actually benefit you. In fact, after you tell your ex that you’ve moved on, there is a good possibility that he may come crawling right back to you. Here’s why.

Most men want to keep their ex girlfriends as a last resort, believe it or not. Part of the reason that they want to break up is because they really want to see what else is out there first. If your ex decides that he can’t find any other girls as great as you, then he knows that you are always going to be there for him. As long as you haven’t already moved on, that is.

Once your ex begins to see that you have moved on, there is a possibility that he is going to panic. He is going to wonder why you’re no longer interested in him and, in many ways, you are going to be turning the whole entire breakup around on him. Once he feels out of control, the reality is going to sink in: he better act now, or risk losing you forever.

When should you tell your ex that you’ve moved on? The ideal time is before he has already moved on from you, but not too soon after you’ve broken up. If a month or longer has passed and your ex still seems into you, this can be a good time. Remember that every breakup is circumstantial, however.

Keep in mind that you need to make this lie believable if you want it to help you win back your ex boyfriend. Calling, texting, instant messaging, and emailing your ex frequently is not going to show him that you are in the process of moving on or have already moved on. In order for the lie to be believable and actually work, you need to keep him out of mind and out of sight. Well, with one exception, in terms of sight.

If your ex does actually see you, the best thing that you can do is make sure that is when you are very happy. Be surrounded by friends or even guys who you are interested in or just really good friends with. Keep a smile on your face. Show him that you are truly happy. Once he sees that you are happy without him, he’s going to wonder where he’s going wrong if he’s still miserable.

And if it doesn’t work? Eventually, you are going to learn to believe the lie. You are going to pretend to be over your ex boyfriend so much that one day, you may wake up and find that you really are. If you can’t win your ex back, you might as well really moved on…and this is a great place to start.

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Should You Lose Weight to Win Your Ex Back?

September 28th, 2009

Winning back an ex boyfriend can be challenging. One of the things that many ex girlfriends think about when they are trying to win their ex back is whether they should try to lose weight. With a new and improved image, winning an ex boyfriend back can be a piece of cake. This is why it’s so beneficial to do a makeover after a breakup. Should you really lose weight to win your ex back though? Here are some things to think about.

Why do you want to lose weight? Are you planning to do it for yourself, or just for your ex? This is the most important question that you need to ask yourself before actually doing it. Losing weight after a breakup can be a great idea if you are trying to boost your self esteem. If it is simply to win your ex boyfriend back, then you may want to think about why you feel that you need to lose weight. The next few questions will probably answer this question for you.

Did your ex constantly pick on your weight? If so, it is important to keep in mind that this is a sign of being a control freak. Do you really want to be with someone who is willing to ridicule you – even if your feelings end up getting hurt during the process? You need to have some respect for yourself. Your ex boyfriend, or any other guy for that matter, is going to be able to respect you until you are able to respect you.

Are you afraid that your ex will find someone more attractive? There is probably a way that you feel this way. If your ex boyfriend talked about other girls and how attractive he found them to be while you were together, this is a problem. No girl wants to hear all about the other girls that their ex boyfriend is checking out and, even though you may not want to admit it, this could mean that he has cheated on you…or was always on the lookout for better options.

Is winning your ex back really worth losing weight over? If your ex boyfriend doesn’t like you the way that you are, losing weight really isn’t worth the time and effort put into it. What would happen if you lost a lot of weight, your ex “falls in love” with you again, and then you suddenly gain it back? He should love you for you… and if he really doesn’t, then there is someone else out there who will one day.

Any girl who feels that she really needs to lose weight so that her ex boyfriend will want her again really needs to reevaluate the situation. If you continue to defend the idea, ask yourself an important question. What would you think if a friend told you that she was going to lose weight in order to win back her ex boyfriend? It’s likely that you would not think it’s okay.

If you are thinking about losing weight after a breakup for reasons aside from winning back your ex, you may want to visit this link. Losing weight for the right reasons and ensuring that your emotions are not getting the best of you is very important. It is very common for young women especially to develop an eating disorder right after a breakup because of the emotional stress involved.

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A Makeover Can Help End Your Breakup

September 28th, 2009
A makeover can really help you win an ex back!

A makeover can really help you win an ex back!

Getting a makeover after you break up may not seem necessary, but it can actually do a lot for you. Even the girl with the most confidence is going to begin to wonder what’s wrong with her after she has been dumped. It’s easy to think that your ex boyfriend dumped you for your personality, but many will wonder if it was, in fact, their appearance. This is why it is such a good idea to consider getting a makeover after your relationship has ended. Here are some of the advantages of breakup makeovers.

Become More Confident

Getting a makeover will help you improve something about yourself. There are many types of makeovers that you can do. Whether you add highlights, opt for a whole new hairstyle, or add some new clothing to your wardrobe, it is likely that you will feel a whole lot better about yourself. Since no guy wants to date a girl who’s not confident, this is very important. Showing your ex that you do not need him and that you are fine without him will help encourage him to get back together with you.

Show Him What He Lost

After being in a relationship for a very long time, it can be difficult to see what exactly you are missing out on. Both people in the relationship become a bit too comfortable with each other and, ultimately, begin to become blind to why they were attracted to each other in the first place. This is why a makeover can help end your breakup. By improving something about yourself, your ex will see what he lost. With a new hair color and newfound confidence, he will have to wonder about what he’s missing out on.

Get Compliments From Others

You will become more confident and show your ex what he lost, but you are also going to be able to make yourself available to compliments from others. Once people see your new look, they are going to compliment you on it. Your ex boyfriend is going to begin to worry if you are going to date one of your potential new suitors. In order to prevent himself from having to experience the jealousy associated with you dating someone else, your ex is going to need to act quickly to win you back. Also keep in mind that the compliments will boost your confidence and if your ex doesn’t get back together with you, you will begin to realize your other options.

A breakup makeover can work to your advantage. Whether you do only a subtle makeover or go for drastic changes, a makeover can really be the key to winning your ex back. Even if this doesn’t do the trick, a makeover will help you feel a whole lot better!

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Fixing a Relationship that Ended Months Ago

September 26th, 2009

Getting back together is never something that’s easy. It is important to remember that time can have a huge impact on whether or not getting back together is even possible. If your relationship ended months ago and you have just decided that you want to fix things now, you may have no clue where to even begin. Here are some tips on how to win your ex boyfriend back after months have gone by.

1. Tell your ex that you want to fix things. It is important to find out what his reaction is. It’s not going to be too easy to get back together with your ex boyfriend if he has already moved on from the situation. If he seems completely over you, then it is a good idea to back away right now.

2. Let your ex boyfriend know that you’ve done a lot of self reflection. If you understand what went wrong with the relationship, then tell him. Your ex might be a little bit confused about why you didn’t want to get back together before, but now do. Most importantly, it is believable. Many couples need months worth of time to determine whether the relationship is worth saving.

3. Bring up the idea of wanting to start over with your ex boyfriend. Sometimes, after months of time have gone by, starting all over can be the only way to fix things. It is important to keep in mind that although you may want to get back together with your ex boyfriend, he might not necessarily want you back. This leads us to the next step, which is the most important.

4. Tell him to get in contact with you. This leaves the situation up to him. Ultimately, this does one very important thing. It gives him the opportunity to prove whether or not he has actually moved on. If your ex boyfriend begins calling you and says that he wants to get together sometime, there is a strong possibility that he misses you just as much as you miss him. If he doesn’t contact you at all, it’s probably because he really doesn’t feel that the relationship is worth saving.

Getting back together with an ex boyfriend can be challenging, and timing is everything. Randomly telling your ex that you want to get back together can be very difficult, and it may confuse him at first. If you do not hear from him within a few weeks to a month’s time, however, then you know that he really doesn’t want to fix things with you. The most important thing to keep in mind is that you are strong. You have managed to be without him for this long. It can only get easier.

For more tips on how to get back together with an ex and make the relationship work, you may want to read “Getting Back Together: How to Create a New Loving Relationship With Your Old Partner and Make it Last” by Bettie Youngs Bilicki.

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How to Fix a Relationship That’s in Danger

September 23rd, 2009

If your relationship is in danger, you are probably wondering what you can do to fix it. As long as both people in the relationship are willing to work through the problems, almost every relationship can be fixed. That said, not every relationship actually ends up getting fixed. One or both people may call it quits just because they do not think it’s worth it, or because it seems hopeless. Here are some tips on how to fix a relationship that’s in danger.

1.Talk About the Problems

The most important thing that you are going to need to do in order to fix a relationship that’s in danger is has a talk with your boyfriend. Let him know what’s on your mind, and find out what’s on his mind. The most important thing that you need to remember when talking is that you both should listen. Being close-minded to each other’s ideas and yelling at one will only encourage you to breakup quicker. Disrespecting each other at a time like this is not going to help.

2. Find Solutions

After you have talked, it is likely that you will both have a good idea of what the problems with your relationship are. Now, it is time for the two of you to come up with a solution to these problems. Some of them may be easy, such as spending more time together or being more respectful of each other’s feelings. Others may be much more challenging. It is important to talk about what you both feel needs to happen in order for the relationship to progress before you can move forward, however.

3. Actually Solving the Problems

The biggest challenge with fixing a relationship that’s in danger is actually solving the problems. There are many people who say that they are going to work on fixing something, but never actually do. In turn, this leads to a breakup. If you both know that you’re struggling in the relationship at the moment, it is important to actually try to solve the problems. Without the effort, from both people, there is no way that the relationship is ever going to be fixed.

Those who have already experienced a breakup can also fix a relationship that’s in danger. Sometimes, following the same tips that were listed above are enough. It may require a bit more effort. Doing it in the timeliest manner is the best thing that you can possibly do. Find out tomorrow what to do if your relationship ended months ago, and you have just decided that you may want to fix it.

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Signs That You’re Heading Towards a Breakup

September 21st, 2009

There are many reasons that a couple may breakup. Although there are many people who are not aware of the signs as it is happening, there are a number of different factors which may indicate that your relationship is coming to an end. Some of the following signs may indicate that you’re heading towards a breakup.

Constant Arguing

Although a certain amount of arguing is normal with every relationship, it is important to pay attention to how often it is occurring. If you and your boyfriend are arguing more than you are getting along, he may be on the verge of breaking up with you.

More Emotions

This often comes with constant arguing. If it feels like you are crying every time you spend time with your boyfriend, this is not good. It is also a bad sign if he is becoming depressed or angry while around you. The more that your relationship feels like an emotional roller coaster for both of you, the worse this is in terms of breaking up.

Spending Less Time Together

Your boyfriend may be spending more time with his friends, or suggesting that you should spend more time with your own. If it feels like he is constantly breaking plans, this is a sign. Many couples spend less than half the amount of time that they normally spend together while breaking up.

Talk of Dating Other People

Your boyfriend might not directly say that you should date someone else. Instead, he may say something along the lines of, “how do you really know I am the one? Maybe you don’t know what else is out there.” This is his way of saying that you should date other people, and that he thinks he should too.

Big Changes

Have both of you changed in drastic ways? Perhaps you always wanted to be a nurse, and now you have decided to attend cosmetology school. Maybe your boyfriend always told you that he wanted a family, but has now decided that he doesn’t. Any changes that seem negative, and even some that seem positive, can indicate the end of a relationship.

You may be able to prevent the relationship from ending. Even if it does end due to the one of these reasons, you may be able to fix things before it’s too late. How though? Check back tomorrow!

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3 Things to Avoid Saying to Your Ex

September 20th, 2009

Winning your ex back can be fairly challenging. It is important to know that the things that you say while broken up can have a huge impact on whether or not you will ever get back together with your ex. Here are 5 things to avoid saying to your ex if you really want to win him back.

1. I’m going to kill myself

If you’re feeling suicidal due to the broke up, it is important for you to seek help. More often than not, however, girls tell their ex boyfriends that they’re going to kill themselves for attention. They want their ex boyfriend’s sympathy. This will do one of two things. It will either scare your ex boyfriend away because he will think that you’re a crazy psycho. This is the likely scenario. There’s also a chance that your ex boyfriend may get back together with you so that you don’t kill yourself. Do you really want this to be the only reason that your ex gets back with you? Because he feels sorry for you? The best thing that you can do is refrain from saying this at all if you want a positive future with your ex.

2. I can’t live without you / I need you

This is probably how you feel at the moment. A breakup can be rough. Even if you do not think that you can ever live without your boyfriend because you do need him, it is important to never let him know that this is the way that you feel. You don’t want your ex to know that he has any type of power over you. Letting him know that you can’t go on without him will reinforce the idea that he is the one who has all of the control over the relationship. Making him feel this way will not ever encourage him to get back together with you. It will only cause him to want to play games.

3. I hate you / I never really loved you

If you really want to get back together with an ex, these are a few of the things that you should definitely avoid saying. It is very easy to say these things out of an anger to an ex boyfriend. If you don’t mean them, you should definitely avoid saying them, no matter how upset you are. This is especially difficult in the beginning. It can also be challenging when time goes by because you will probably feel frustrated when your ex doesn’t get back together with you right away. And you may feel like you hate your ex sometimes, but if you really did hate him, you wouldn’t be trying to win him back…would you?

Saying one of the above things can really hurt your chances of getting back together with your ex. The best thing that you can do is be yourself. Check out our last blog entry on whether you should be bitchy your ex.

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Should You Be Bitchy to Your Ex?

September 19th, 2009

While there are some girls who have an ex who won’t talk to them at all, there are others who have an ex who won’t leave them alone. If this happens, should you be bitchy to your ex? Will it help increase your chances of getting back together with him in the future, or will it just push him away even more? Here’s what you should consider.

If your ex is persistently calling you or trying to contact you, then you may be a little bit baffled – especially if he hasn’t made any efforts to hang out with you. It is important to think about what he is saying. Does he say that he wants to be with you still? If so, do you think that there’s a chance he is leading you on? Under these circumstances, then it is important to stand your ground.

You do not necessarily need to be bitchy, per se. However, you do need to come up with certain expectations for your ex boyfriend. Try to turn this whole situation around on your ex. Tell him that if he wants to be with you, then he will make the effort to see you. Otherwise, he should not waste both your and his time by constantly trying to contact you. Once you come up with these “rules” or guidelines, it is important for you to stand your ground. You never EVER want to allow your ex boyfriend to walk all over you.

When talking to an ex, the best thing that you can do is avoid being overly nice to him. Although you need to have a certain level of respect for your ex, you should not give him any type of special treatment. Treat him the same way that you would treat any of your friends. By making the decision to break up with you, he lost the privilege to that special treatment from you. Until he makes the decision to get back together with you, you do not have to go out of your way to be nice. Also keep in mind that if you’re trying to win him back, you won’t want to be rude. You don’t want to give any type of attitude because he won’t want to get back together with you if you don’t show his respect or decency.

The main key is to find a balance. Don’t be overly nice. At the same time, don’t be rude or overly bitch to your ex boyfriend either. Remember that the way you act towards your ex will have a huge impact on whether or not you will get back together.

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Why Your Ex Won’t See You

September 18th, 2009

There are many reasons that an ex boyfriend may not want to see you. Depending on the specific circumstances, he may or may not let you know why he doesn’t care to see you at the moment. If he doesn’t, then you are probably left wondering why. After all, you would give just about anything to see him if you had the chance…so why doesn’t he want to see you? Here are some common reasons an ex may not want to see you.

Self Reflection

Maybe your ex feels as though he hasn’t been able to think about the situation enough. Before he makes the decision to see you and either have you convince him to get back together or complicate the situation even more, he wants some time to think about it himself. He may need to understand what went wrong with the relationship before he can even think about seeing you face-to-face. Self reflection of a breakup is important. If your ex says this is the reason, believe him. It’s not easy to admit, and necessary for most people to do.

Your Self Reflection

If you and your ex boyfriend have argued about the breakup at all, this could have something to do with why he might not want to see you. Although you shouldn’t agree with things that you do not believe in, fighting can be a sign of defiance or even denial about the end of a relationship. Your ex may not think that you have come to terms with the breakup yet, or he may feel that you haven’t been able to give it enough reflection yet.

Pain

Your ex boyfriend could be taking the breakup much more difficultly than you are imagining. He could be afraid that seeing you could bring up some of the emotions that he is trying to bottle inside at the moment. If you have done anything to hurt your ex boyfriend, this also could cause him to be experiencing pain that may cause him to not want to see you. Cheating is a good example of this type of pain.

Moving On

Although you don’t want to think about it, there is a chance that your ex may want to move on or is already in the process of moving on. Once he is over you, seeing you is going to be the last thing on his mind. If he is trying to get over the relationship and find his way in the world of dating other girls, this could be why he doesn’t want to see you.

Now, keep in mind that there is a problem if your ex says that he wants to get back together with you, but still refuses to see you. If he is really serious about getting back together, then he should be trying to find a way to make the relationship work. Not seeing you, especially if months go by, is a problem. When this happens, you should consider whether he still really wants to be with you or if he is just saying he does.

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When Your Ex Says He Still Wants to Be With You

September 17th, 2009

It is not at all uncommon for an ex boyfriend to say that he still wants to be with you. How do you know if he is being honest about it though? As hard as it may be for you to believe, there is a chance that your ex boyfriend could be lying to you. Here are some of the factors to consider when trying to determine whether or not to believe an ex who claims to want to be with you still.

Why Isn’t He With You?

If he really wants to be with you, then why isn’t he? Is there something that is interfering with the relationship? Maybe he is too busy at school or work, but if this is the case, he should still be able to find some time for you. Even if you are only seeing each other once a week, it is better than nothing if being with you is what he really wants. If he is really over you or getting over you, then obviously he’s not going to want to spend time with you and this could mean he is lying.

Is He Trying to String You Along?

There are many guys who don’t want to be with their ex, but they also don’t want her to be with anyone else. It is incredibly selfish and, for you, it may be hard to recognize. If your ex seems incredibly jealous if he finds out that you may date someone, there is a good chance that this is the case. This leads to the next point, as it is an explanation as to why guys try to string their ex girlfriends along.

Are You His Last Resort?

Many ex boyfriends don’t want their ex to find someone else because they want her to be their last resort. In the event that he doesn’t find another girlfriend, then there is a chance that your ex boyfriend may want to come back to you. This can’t happen if you’re with someone else though, so he has to make it seem like he still wants to be with you – even if it’s not something that he really wants right now.

Although it may be hard to admit, there is a strong chance that your ex could be lying or isn’t dedicated enough to wanting to be with you right now. If he really wanted to be with you, then he would find a way. This doesn’t mean that he will never want to be with you in the future, but unless he makes the effort to prove that he wants to be with you, he probably doesn’t at this moment. It is important to decide if the relationship is worth saving if you suspect that your ex doesn’t want to be with you.

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